Tender is the Night

Nicole and Dick Driver - Insanity courted by a man who falls in love with youth and becomes attached to it out of responsibility. Is that it? Is that the story? 

There is more, and yet, that is the thread that weaves it together. And Nicole's story becomes more sad with each reading. It is such a small part of the novel - her reason for breakdowns - and yet it is such a large part of her life. When I step back and dissect Nicole I have this certain softness for her because of what she has gone through, and the fact that she lets Dick feel like the man in control, even though in a way she pulls the strings.  

Fitzgerald's world is so fueled by men who don't seem to have anything together. And he paints the women as lucky to exist in their crazy fun party world. And yet you start to understand that the women are the reason why the men create the world they live in. Perhaps not on the surface, but definitely underneath, and I think that is evident with Dick's relationship with both Nicole and Rosemary. He is alive with both women - both with pain and excitement. And yet you get the feeling that both women would exist surely without him. And how much of that does Fitzgerald pin on their beauty? His world is punctuated by beauty. The women, the men, the surroundings. One is wrapped in it, and perhaps that is where the meaning lies. They are living in lush beauty, yet their world is shrouded in waste and sadness. 

... A bit later... 

Waste is right. Life as waste, beauty as waste. Nicole finally decides to do her own thing and step out of Dick's parental pose, yet she steps into the arms of another man who knows what is best for her. Better? Come on! What the hell. The more I think about it the more irritated I become. She saves herself from one way of life, and chooses another that is going to be slightly less boring for a while. I have to be honest - she really pissed me off. 

And Rosemary... I at least felt some sort of pleasure in the life she led. Sure, she was googly eyed around Dick, at least for a while, but she didn't need him, and I don't really think she needed anyone except for her mother. ( I don't think that is any better, but for the sake of this entry I will leave it at that.) She wasn't honest with herself completely, but she seemed to know the limits of her crush and so called love. 

And Dick. At first I kind of felt sorry for him. And then I realized that he was living the same life in the United States as he did in Europe. The same life. Getting into trouble, running from complications, falling in and out of desire. And it didn't matter where he was or who he was with. He was living to undo himself. The loss of Nicole didn't matter nearly as much as the loss of his age of desirability. 

Euro Cup 2008

It is a game of heartbreak and passion. Michael Ballak and the German team has stolen my heart, and once again I am deep in the throws of Football Love. Watching Euro Cup enables me to call it football, because it is so different than watching MLS Soccer. ( I do have to say that America has come a long way, and I am hopeful for the future, but the United States still has a long way to go until they play as beautifully as some of the European teams. And South America for that matter.) 

I love this game. There is a pace to it that is unmatched, and the players are holding up more than the hope of their teams. Their fans are passionate to teh point of obsession. 

  It is about the pitch - the green of it and size of it and how the ball and players use every single part of it to control the game. it is about the Uniform - how the players grab uniforms whenever they can, or how a player leans down to fix a sock just to catch his breath, or how the jersey hangs outside the shorts for some players, and is tucked in for others. It is about the chanting crowd and how their every breath lingers on a single cross. But mostly it is about the ball. The way players move for the ball even when it is on the other side of the field. The way plays are anticipated and carried out, and then when the ball bounces strangely the game is altered to a new path, and the players adapt. The momentum of the game is like a techno beat. it starts out slow and methodically, and slowly moves and grinds its way to a pitch until you are on the edge of everything just waiting for the shot, the save, the volley. And then it breaks, and the players know it, and the ball crashes into the back of net, and the players are overcome with emotion. 

Michael Ballak and Germany have an amazing team. They play with a confidence that is so fun to watch. They have so many weapons, and Ballak is the steadfast among them. Germany is a team that can play beautifully and link passes together and look composed, yet they are also a team that even when back on their heels can whack the crap out of the ball and hit it into the net with their thigh. Not exactly pretty, but awesome. Ballak is the anchor. The quiet storm that links things together on the field. 

Germany and Spain . . . Should be a great game to watch, and I am looking forward to it. Euro Cup Final 2008. After this MLS just won't be the same. But hey, World Cup is only 2 years away. 

And we should still have hope that Americans will some day fully appreciate the beauty of this game.